Profile of a fictitional person .

Nyne E. Levin

Full name - Nyne Elmer Levin

Date of birth - Has yet to go on a date resulting in a birth ; lots of abortions though .

Occupation - Humorist , though he would tell you philosopher .

Age - Thirty five years , although he often lies about this , and says it's a number so mathematically brilliant - and subtle - that most people don't even perceive he's said it when he says it .

Favorite texture - Soft , but more often than not , rough .

Favorite name to give a dog - Joshua , but more often than not , Ruff .

Favorite races in order of preference - White ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...

Most humbling experience - Telling a robber he had the guts to face him , just before the said robber opened fire with a rifle , thus spilling a good share of Nyne's aforementioned guts .

Favorite dinosaur - An Ultrasaurus ; retaining its essential mass , but changing its appearance to that of a woman's breast .

Favorite word - " Word " , because it once meant something to young blacks when it seemed nothing else would .

Most scandalous fetish - Loving people for who they are , rather then what their personality is .

Most idiotic hair cut - A tie between them all .

Worst case of whooping cough - The one he died from .

Died from - Whooping cough .

Background - Nyne Levin was born a baby , and died a man ... Killed a man , rather , then died a man . His current whereabouts are unknown , but it's assumed he did not go to Heaven .